Friday, 23 March 2007

Grizzly E-Mail

Not that I’m taking any sides in this decision, but I wonder if anybody bothered to consult the grizzlies before lifting protection. After all, it is their hides on the line – literally – and they deserve a heads up before the first shot is fired.
I’m thinking a face to face meeting would present some dangers for the human delegate if disagreements turned somewhat hostile. Just those claws drumming on the meeting log would send a horde of goose bumps up my spine.
I considered snail mail, but since grizzlies eat just about anything including snails, I figured that postal people or Fedex guys would also be fair game.
Dropping leaflets seemed to be an excellent option until I realized education benefits had never been extended to the grizzly population. Come to think of it, I never noticed a library out there or even a newsstand; of course, grizzly bears are not known to hold down any 9 to 5 job too long except for the Hollywood star types.
Then it dawned on me. The wildlife service has gone to considerable expense to equip the bears with radio collars, so it should be an easy matter to add in a phone and e-mail service (a few cell towers in the park shouldn’t bother anyone; if it does tell them to get a life).
Maybe the authorities can send out a group e-mail warning to the grizzlies, 24 hours in advance regarding new hunting regulations, which will give them adequate opportunity to cover their asses.

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